Thursday, April 1, 2010

Life as I knew it is Officially OVER!!!

No worse feeling in the world than getting a call from your husband saying "You left your email account open...how many men have you been fucking and if you want to save our marriage you better get home now!!!".  He did read some pretty nasty stuff but thankfully not everything.  "honey, I got wrapped up into the online world of sex"..."there was never any physical contact with anyone".  We are now working towards rebuilding our relationship.  In a way, although I hate that he looks at me with such disgust and he will probably never trust me again, I knew that it had gone too far and now I'm ready to put my life back together.  Not sure how or what that will entail but I owe it not only to him but to myself and most of all to our kids to make the change.  My desires and passions will not disappear but I'm hoping I can fuel them in a safer way. 

I will be back to check up on all of you periodically...live vicariously through your lives, so you better make it good.

Cheers..;)

7 comments:

  1. Oh no. I'm so sorry on so many levels. Did Kat make this post? Or Agnes? How can we tell?

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  2. This is Kat's blog, unfortunately! I have escaped implication so far (despite having many messages in amongst the many others Kat had saved)...I think all of us living this life, walk a very fine line. This easily could have been me (and nearly has for other reasons)...I feel sick for Kat! And I will attempt to support her in any way I can.

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  3. Ugh. I hope things work out. We all walk a very fine line, that is so true... *Hugs*

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  4. Kat - hope things work out and whatever is meant to be will be. Easily said but I can totally understand what you are going through!

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  5. Kat, this is a sobering message to us all. The thought of this happening makes me take a long hard look at myself. I do wish you well and will miss your insights and comments.
    Take care, G.

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  6. I'm so sorry ! I hope you'll be able to work things through. Good luck !

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  7. Thank you everyone for your kind words, I sometimes think I really don't deserve them. I was thinking today that hell would be better than dealing with the shit i have been dealing with these past couple of days. I have to just move forward though and believe that things can only get better from here...I guess this is what rock bottom feels like. Through all of this though I still can't stop thinking of B and wishing I could just keep him as my friend as well as Music Man. They are so much more than just the sex...but I can understand how completely wrong that would be seeing that how we got to where we are is with the idea of hooking up sexually. I guess I really can't have my cake and eat it too...ugh

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